Points of View
by DigitalQuillsOfFury
Summary: Bashing of an irritating Mary-Sue OC and Gaara being clueless. Told twice from two POVs.


**A great pool of wtfery and a character that will really piss you off. Enjoy.**

My name is Emily Sakimi D'Souza. I have beautiful long blond hair that's blue at the tips. It's naturally like that of course and changes colours depending on my mood. I also have purple eyes because, let's face it, purple eyes are cool. I'm really hot; anyone can tell you that. I'm also extremely talented and became a jounin at the ripe young age of 15.

As I'm walking down the sandy streets of Suna, I notice many men gawking and whistling at me. Of course they are. I mean, who can resist my charms? I pay them no heed though. Except for the cute ones. And as I notice a particularly dashing brunette wink at me, I turn to blow him a kiss as I round the corner, unintentionally bumping into someone while I was distracted.

I step back, ready to chew out whoever was impudent enough not to get out of my way, and I'm faced with the most gorgeous teal eyes ever.

Oh. My. God.

It was the Kazekage.

Not only is he the youngest Kage ever, and therefore totally talented, he is hot. I mean, I guess he's a bit on the short side but he'll definitely grow out of that. He was good looking even before becoming Kazekage, I guess, but dating the monstrous host of Shukaku wouldn't have helped my reputation one bit. Besides, this guy was scary. But seriously, now that he has those looks and that status, he'd be the perfect arm candy. All the girls will be so jealous when they find out I'm dating him.

Notice how I'm using "when" and not "if"? That's because I'm confident in myself. Men are such simple creatures. Show a bit of cleavage here, touch their arm a bit there, and they fall like putty into your hands, free to mold into whatever you want them to be, be it a one night stand or a friend-zoned slave.

I've had my eye on the Kazekage for years. I mean, who hasn't? I've just never had the opportunity to properly make him mine. I mean, flirting when he hands out missions in his office can only get you so far.

So I look up at him under my long, curved, perfectly mascara-ed lashes and flutter my eyes a bit, "Oh, Lord Kazekage! I didn't see you there. Fancy...bumping into you here like this. Must be my lucky day."

I use the most seductive voice I can muster. He better appreciate what I'm doing for him here.

The way he looks at me tells me he's instantly affected. His eyes travel down my body, giving me the once over. I have perfect curves. I smirk, knowing that he's checking me out. He totally wants me. I've got this one in the bag.

"You know what? As an apology, why don't I treat you to some coffee?" I tuck my arms beneath my breasts and push them up to show off my cleavage, "Think of it as a thank you for all your hard, hard work for our village and being and amazing and most powerful Kazekage."

Seduce, compliment, and when the time is right, devour him. This technique has never failed me before. I grin ferally as the red-haired cutie glances to his side, clearly flustered. Even the stoic Kazekage has hormones, it seems.

He opens his mouth to speak, but I grab his arm first, remembering to tuck it snuggly between my ample breasts for maximum effect, "Come on! I know a great place!"

He's pleasantly surprised as I drag him along. I feel the curves of his muscled arm in my grasp. Oh, he's got a great body too. He's perfect!

I know it's a long walk, and not wanting to bore him, I begin to talk. I tell him as much about myself as I can. He needs to know me better if we're going to be soulmates. I tell him all about the beauty pageants I entered, and won, and my amazing skills as a kunoichi, and of course my accomplishment of becoming a jounin at such a young age. He's impressed for sure.

I smile happily when we arrive at the coffee shop. I turn to him and decide to risk calling him by his first name. Intimacy is important after all.

"Gaa-" I stop in shock. The amazing well toned arm I was holding had melted into sand. In fact, my darling date had vanished, leaving a large but solid mound of sand in his place.

I had been dragging sand.

I redden in embarrassment. How long had I been doing this? And in public? How many people saw? Me, dragging a mound of sand down the street like some idiot! How dare I be humiliated like this? Retribution definitely needs to be brought upon the perpetrator!

And by perpetrator, I obviously mean the person who kidnapped my beloved Gaara of course. It's a dog eat dog world out there, and clearly some jealous bitch saw the two of us strolling along, madly in love with eachother, and in her petty jealousy, stole him away from me!

Well that bitch is gonna pay! Nobody damages my pride like that!

* * *

><p>I sweep my eyes across the streets of Suna. The sun beats down heavily, and I know many people would be sweating if it wasn't for the fierce winds and biting sands drying up all moisture.<p>

Many citizens acknowledge me in greeting and bowing. I nod politely back to each of them, reminiscing the times when I could never show my face in public without being scorned. I see young children prancing around, playfully teasing and chasing one another. I can't help but smile inwardly, thankful that these children would not have to face the same kind of childhood I did.

My thoughts must have been more distracting that I thought, because I am only broken out of my reverie by the feeling of a thud against a sand barrier that had formed in front of me without my knowing.

I had collided with someone.

I glance down at the figure and recognize her immediately. My inner smile turns into a grimace.

It's that kunoichi with the mental illness.

I know that it's improper and rude to discriminate against a person with a disability such as this, however, the habits of this particular person usually brought about very uncomfortable situations.

I recall one time she when was receiving a mission from me and found it necessary to sit in my lap to take the manila folder. I understood from that point on that all was not right with her mental state.

Her voice pulls me from my thoughts. I'm not really paying attention to what she's saying, but rather at her eyes. They're blinking rapidly, and I realize that she must have an eye infection as well. That must be what all that clumpy black cream sitting on her eyelashes must be for. It's medicine. I feel slightly guilty and pity her. It must be difficult to live your life afflicted by so many illnesses. Perhaps the condition of her hair is an illness as well. I always assumed that it was a very bad dye job.

It is by following her hair that I notice her clothes. Her tank top seems to cover no more than a bra, and as I look down at her shorts, I realize that they end where the leg starts. The extent of her mental disability must be more serious than I previously thought. This girl wasn't even able to properly dress herself, and had to brave the harsh Suna weather in only her underwear. I remember that she is in fact a jounin and make a mental note to demote her. No matter how talented, no ninja this mentally incapable can bear the large responsibility that accompanies such a rank.

She says something about being her chaperon for coffee that I barely catch. As much as I pity the woman, spending time in her company was definitely not something I wanted to do. I glance to my side, searching for something I could use as an excuse to leave her after she babbles some incoherent statement that I don't quite catch.

I notice Temari browsing a selection of melons at the grocers, and I begin to decline the girl in front of me, whose name, as it dawns upon me, I can't remember. My sister needs help carrying the groceries. Yes. Of course.

But then she touches me.

Shocked, I simply do nothing for a while as she grabs my arm and leads me away from my sister and salvation. It is once again her voice that disrupts my stunned state. She's rambling about something. And she isn't stopping. It doesn't take long before her screeching voice begins to grate on my nerves. It pounds upon my eardrums like the fists of a hundred Narutos on a ramen shop's door.

I ponder what I should do. For a moment, I want to kill her, a brief flash of bloodlust colouring my world red. But then I remember: this woman has a disability. You must be lenient. Instead, while she's busy describing the details of her makeup drawer to me, I replace myself with a sand clone.

Surprisingly, she, disabled indeed, doesn't even notice, despite the fact that she was gripping me in her very hands. Perhaps I should demote her straight to genin instead of chunin. Clearly she isn't perceptive enough, and I wonder how she ever became a jounin and who the idiot examiner (who I must fire) who passed her was.

I let out a sigh of relief as I watch her retreating back carry away a clone that's slowly degenerating as it's carried out of my range of control.

I turn around and head back in the direction I came from.

Temari may need help with the groceries.


End file.
